Sunday, December 30, 2007

Chapter Twenty Two - Death of a Cheerleader

Welcome back. Short break I know, I seem to have a preference for knocking out chapters 2 at a time. I must warn you now this chapter contains scenes that may horrify some viewers (Unless you make it a regular practice to kill off sims, then it might be all so familiar.) I feel so bad, but Genesis, Ian and Chardonnay all ganged up on me, so all responsibility belongs to them.

"No! Hennessy does not need to know about this pirate boy. If Donny is fine with it, so should you be."

"I was just gonna tip him honestly, luv."

"With what? I remember what it was like being an NPC fortune sim, you have no money."

"This is true, but somehow when I tip autonomously, there is always the right amount of money in my pocket. You've done it too."

"It helps boost the households income."

Already the tension has begun to mount. At least it is bringing the in-laws closer together.

Where are you going with that trash Genesis?

"Oh. Nowhere really."

Awww C'mon you can't keep it secret forever you know. Please tell me whats going on.

"Oh, okay. But you have to promise me that Hennessy never finds out."

Finds out what?


"Ian is really the mastermind of the plan. He said if we couldn't make Candice understand about privacy then we should give her more privacy than she bargined for. He's the one that installed the secret room upstairs. Chardonnay befriended Candice in order for her to move in. For some reason she wouldn't die when we tried to get her in the room when she was still an NPC. Anywho we lured her up to the secret room with a box full of pizza. Once she was inside Ian boarded up the door. Hennessy never goes into Chardonnays room so we should be pretty safe. We left some trash in the room to give Candice something to do. Donny says that Candice is more interested in her stupid chants to really care. But she'll figure it out soon enough."

So you're going to kill her?

"No we're just going to deny her some basics until she doesn't need them any more."

I think that is the definition of killing.

"Well just don't tell Hennessy ok?"

Sure. This makes you lot far more interesting anyways. Why don't you want Hennessy to know?

"Dunno really. Just more fun with the three...I mean four now of course, knowing I guess."

"All I wanted was to be part of the only Greek house on campus." *sob* "I'm too young and beautiful to die! How will the cheerleaders cope without my bubbly and outgoing personality...Oh no I have a term paper due!"

The penny finally drops for poor Candice. Let this be a lesson for all future cheerleaders, Iata Pi will not tolerate bed-side woohoo cheering.

"My time has come. Good bye cruel world. I love you mommy....Please no, not yet I still have 500 words to go on my term paper...." *choke gurgle die*

"Pee-euw this one stinks. I hate the stinkers. Huh, Steele....hmmm. Oh foul play, Well done! Perpetrated by the Vulcan twins. Nice kids, good to see them remembering old Grimmy. Time to beam her up Scotty!"

It took Candice a very long time to die, which mean a cockroach infestation of the entire top floor. Of course having a boyfriend in the extermination business is very handy. Ian not only killed all the cockroaches, but he also discretely removed any evidence of door tampering before discovering the body. As far as Hennessy is concerned, Candice locked herself in that room.

No sooner had Candice perished when the Iata Pi household was awakened to the pitter patter of little feetsies. Yes, a burglar, with nary a burglar alarm in sight. Thats ok, Chardonnay is a naturally light sleeper and was able to call the cops before the burglar even got in the house.

After a protracted and every entertaining fisticuffs the cop was triumphant! Chardonnay enjoyed the show (truly she was the only one awake.)

"I would have gotten away with it too if it weren't for those pesky kids and their womrat!"

Not only was Chardonnay successful in preventing any loss of property, she also managed to finagle a nice little reward before returning to sleep.

At the beginning of Senior year I send the twins down to the community music hall to catch them up with Genesis who has always been about 25 hours ahead of them in the college clock. It wasn't a complete time waster, they managed to sock away around $1800 each for their stint on stage. Not bad at all I'd say.

"You look so hawt."

"Not now Genes....I do? You're pretty hot too."

Okay, I learnt something. Never let two sims who aren't in love twirl together on the Ice skating rink. Apparently twirling is NOT a platonic activity.

I would like to introduce you to the place holder for this generation. His name is Amin, and he is a Llama. Under that studly llama head is a face that may very well make it's way into the family. We're still a little unsure. It will at least make it's way on to one of the side branches. After all Chardonnay wants 3 children through college.

At last the time has come! All three of them are graduated and grown up and ready to face the world. And hopefully if I seperate the three of them there will be no more deaths....Then again Ian and Chardonnay may just prove to be a lethal combination. Bring on Generation 3!

It seemed like college took forever this round. It's bound to get worse next time the Vulcans return to Iata Pi. But for now, we get to concentrate on making babies, and fitting those babies into the main household. It should be fun, stay tuned!

Chapter Twenty One - Neon Genesis

Now that the madness that is Christmas is over, I have the time to up-date on the shenanigans of the third generation of the Vulcan Family. Of course the fact that Real Lee infected me with a summer cold may mean that I am less coherent than usual, but I will persevere.

It seems the hankering for Lobster Thermadore has bred true in Hennessy. Although most of the time the kids seem to prefer dropping into the campus pizzeria.

"I thought I told you to stay away, skank!"

"I really don't remember that."

And the cheerleader continues to harass poor Genesis.

"Thats it, time for some beat downs. Prepare to cry Ms Steele!"

Yeah of course the feral cheerleader wins all fights, I think it's because she has to hunt her own food and what have you. But now Genesis and Candice really REALLY don't like each other.

"Look for the last time, get the *tweet tweet* outta my bedroom you nutter."

I suspect that the feral cheerleader is looking for a greater challenge now that she has defeated our domesticated one. However, I really don't like her chances against dread pirate princess Chardonnay.

"You slip her the year old pizza huh?"

"Yeah." *snigger*

"Nice one." *snigger*

The women of Iata Pi have come together with a common purpose. It is time to destroy the feral cheerleader Candice Steele.

"Aww c'mon, I didn't mean it like that Candice. I meant you were an utter peanut butter nutter like in those old ads. We'll play kicky bag and forget all about it huh?"

I suspect something is a brewing in the mind of our heiress. For once she is being nice to the cheerleader.

Beware of piratical exterminators bearing sacks full of magic red dust. That's all I have to say on the matter, yet another DJ Booth. I wish just once I'd get a decorative object. Is that really too much to ask?

"You guys are freaks."

I think at some stage Bryn or Paden invited Jonah to join the greek house. He keeps on just waltzing over and ringing the door bell for hours and hours.

And when we do let Jonah in he reminds us that we let him eat out of the garbage even though we never had any control over him. We don't let him inside the house much any more.

"So the pizza didn't work huh?"

"Nup, we've got to do something else."

"Ian has an idea."

"You told Ian? Are you mad?"

"Look honey, I know you and my brother have 2 lightening bolts, but it's a whole different ball game when there are three. Me and Ian were made for each other."

"As long as Hennessy doesn't find out."


The girls are still trying to find a way to get rid of their feral cheerleader problem once and for all.

Bryn turns up once more to rock out on the new addition to the greek house. I know if I had installed a piano last generation there is no way Bryn would be perma-plat now.

Those crazy kids seem more interested in a smustling marathon than the rock god jamming in the foyer.

"Don't look honey, I know how much that cheerleader disturbs you...."

Once again the feral cheerleader feels the need to stalk the occupants of the chancellors hacienda.

"Are you sure you want to do this luv? There ain't no coming back from it."

"Yes Ian. I am sure."

There is a plot afoot I think. It makes me anxious I don't like it when my sims plot with one another. But there is not that much longer to go. The kiddies are in junior year now, and things are running along smoothly. Well except for the fact that Genesis really really wants to see the ghost of Candice. But that's another story surely?

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Chapter Twenty - The screaming memes

This chapter isn't so much a college chapter, but more a sometimes these Sims are creepy and weird and very very funny. I was going to make it a little more seasonal with Bryn and Brandi hosting a Christmas party. However, after you've baked the cookies and stuff there really isn't all that much else to do.

Of course you could make friends with Santa, the laughing weeing old man in a big red suit. Bryn did, and I think Ian did too. But then the fuzz got wind of the party and at the obscenely late hour of 11pm came and broke the party up. Because the noise was disturbing the neighbours five kilometres away.

"Love you hun."

"Love you too baby."

"Wanna check on the twins?"

"Can't I'm about to PUG Kara."

"Well I can't either, I've got to play the Sims."

"They'll be okay."

I thought I'd give you an update on the Imaginary Me's as well. As you can see Everything is hunky-dory thanks to the help of the creepy little baby of fixing things. And yes, if we had twins the conversation would go something like that....I blame Lee and that's all I have to say on the matter.

"If you had checked on them when I had told you none of this would have happened...."

"If I had been asked if I wanted twins it wouldn't have happened either!"

Yeah, it was raining, then it lighteninged and made the gate catch on fire so I made the newly teened Angel put it out. The newly childed Xanthe came out to look and caught herself on fire. She was this close to dying, but I managed to find the phone in the end. Of course once the original fire was out, Angel immediately joined her dad in panicking and it was only my imaginary self's valiant actions that prevented my imaginary child from dying.

Of course the fireman arrived about 30 seconds too late, but as you can see Xanthe managed to survive okay. I also bought a pretty calendar from the fire lady. All in the name of child cancer charity of course.

"Fire bad. Tree Pretty."

Believing that the action was over I was about to return to the regularly scheduled Vulcan's when lo and behold I hearkened upon this scene. Poor Imaginary Lee. Nearly losing his imaginary daughter sent him into aspiration failure. Not that Xanthe or Angel particularly care. And where is our 3rd imaginary child I hear you ask? (OK you didn't, but knowing where he is just makes things funnier)

"Sweet sweet technology, at last I have you all to myself....educate me in the ways of the gamer and I will be your minion forever!"

Yup, our beloved imaginary boy is also a geek. Whilst he did manage to call the fire station to save his twin sister, he immediately made a beeline for the computer while the fire distracted his parents. I think I like Xander the best.

"Go Hen! Way to play that Piano. You're the best...." And so on and so forth.

Genesis has started taking her cheer leading duties a little more seriously. A little too seriously if you ask me.

"Bloody game. I hate you, I'm going to come back with a baseball bat if you don't start letting me win."

Yeah, I suspect that Mr Ian (cos his last name is unpronounceable) may have a serious niceness deficiency. I have my fingers crossed.

Chardonnay has long since perfected her snowman making technique, but that doesn't mean she can't make one every now and then for the fun of it. Particularly when her boyfriend is threatening the video game machine.

Of course, not to be outdone, Genesis immediately makes another snowman to cheer on Chardonnays snowman. Either that or the girls are creating an army.

"What the...? I told you missy, to stay the blazes away from MY HOUSE! I will open a can of whoopass on you"

"Ow! But the head cheerleader said I had to come here. *sniffsniff*

"Pull the other one moron. I AM the head cheer leader.... And I say run before I paint you in my school colors....Black and blue."


The cheerleader actually had the nerve to come back after Genesis's masterful abuse last chapter.

"Woohoo! Go you! Get you some sugar! Vo Gerbits!"

We suspect this is why Genesis is so against this particular cheerleader. It's hard enough for Chardonnay and Ian to find a few special moments alone without having their own personal cheering squad. Strangely enough we haven't seen Robin the cow so far this stint in college. I'm convinced she's saving up.

And thats all we have time for today. Things just keep on ticking along, in their weird and wonderful fashion. Undoubtedly there will be greater and weirder things in the future for the Vulcan Clan, you'll just have to stay tuned to find them out. :D

Happy Holidays!

Chapter Nineteen - It's that time again...

Yes that's right, it is that time again. The time for college. Wow. I love Uni, it's so much fun....yeah. We'll just get right on it then.

As you can see the twins didn't rack up as much dosh as Bryn and Paden did, but Brandi really really wants her plastical surgery machine, and I really couldn't put up with her whinging or the teen-aged angst so I packed the kiddies off to college.

Now that Chardonnay is out of the parental house she's really started to channel her inner pirate. The only reason she bought this outfit was because it had a corset.

Of course we were both much much more excited about finally being able to do 'things' with the exterminator Ian. He's a fortune sim, but we won't hold that against him if he manages to sire green-eyed babies.

"Ahoy me-ah. I see land-ah! So heave too before I kick you like the scabrous dogs you are."

I was going to say college had mellowed Chardonnay, however then my instant simlish translating software* kicked in, and I realized she puts Captain Bligh to shame.

*Instant Simlish Translating Software, aka 'ISTS', and 'My Imagination', is in fact only available in my head. It also works for a variety of other programs including 'Making boring relatives more interesting.' And '1001 reasons why you were far too busy to wash the dishes that are not related to playing The Sims 2'

"Wow who would have thought you'd actually be kinda pretty under that maxis hair and no make-up."

"Oh Hennessy. Tee hee"

Oh yes, both kids managed to get into the greek house, and I figured if I was going to have to play Genisis for the entire college session, I may as well make her over. Imagine my surprise when she cleaned up pretty. I didn't even know it was possible for that face template. You learn something new every day.

"My darlin' I've been lusting after you ever since I was a teen. Please say that you'll marry me and come live with my parents in the house that didn't really have roaches, so we called you anyways."

"Oh yes! Is that real?"

"Of course it's real, nothing but the best for you darlin. Of course it might have fallen off a truck at some stage on its journey from exotic South Africa....."

The tradition of long-winded and confused proposals continues. I was actually on the verge of flipping for the two, but Chardonnay is definately the more interesting of the two twins, and we have yet to get the platinum family grave stone, so she is the heir. Besides, Ian (the exterminator) is way hotter than Genisis. Oh and yeah, he's a fortune sim, so he'll be happy with the match.

I just included this screen cos they look so sweet and innocent and very very pleased with themselves. I haven't the heart to tell them that this bed has seen far more action than they could possibly imagine. Yup, it's Bryn's Bed 'o Lurve.

"So my sweet how does an endless supply of simoleons, and unending life sound to you? If you say you'll be my wife all this could be yours. And more!"

"Endless? As in, they haven't invented a number to count our riches? Oh yes yes yes you crazy fool!"

Genisis is also a fortune sim. And also very pleased to be joining the family.

More smooching in the upstairs bed room. This bed is considerably more innocent than the one next door however. The Iata Pi house is now proud to announce it has 3 bedrooms (2 doubles) and 2 bathrooms, and a dining room no-one ever uses cos they'd rather eat in the study.

"C'mon Smythe, Donny is absolutely gonna love you!"

Some suitors bring roses, and perhaps a DJ Booth or fountain, not our boy Ian, he seems to know the way to his princesses heart is through her need to have piratical accessories. Please note he has also given himself a more piratical look thanks to the wonders of modern television (and Mod the Sims 2)

Unfortunately we had to delete Smythe (or rather, we used the mighty Hammer of Doom in the build mode) because he'd always bug out trying to get outside. Thats okay though, Van Clef is still sitting at home awaiting Chardonnay's return.

Its a big scary day for our love-birds, thats right, the parents are over, the victim is over, and its time that they should meet. Of course if Bryn and Brandi were anything other than romance sims they might have actually cared. They were more interested in playing the piano and munching down on chef salad.

Nothing says 'family bonding' like a little kicky bag with your prospective father-in-law. The jeering of your soon-to-be-mother-in-law is just a little added bonus.

"Look, I don't know how many times I have to tell you people. Iata Pi is a one cheerleader household, and you aint it honey."

"But...I've got to raise school spirit."

"Don't give me that bollocks. You and I both know all you're looking for is an in with the family. And they are also a one cheerleader family. Now beat it before I split kick your gerbits back to Strangetown!"

Hold me? I'm scared. Normally Genisis is pretty mellow, she's a lazy sim, I know she has the constant slouch of the mentally deficient. However add another cheerleader to the mix and she suddenly gets all feisty and territorial. Thankfully, domesticated females do not feel the need to mark their territory with pee.

On that delightful note I'll conclude this chapter by saying.... aww crud, I ran outta words. I have a new monitor now, so bob knows what the screens will look like in a couple of chapters. The next one I know will be with pictures taken on the old 17' monitor (I have now got 22' of flatness.) I suggest taking a coffee break whilst I rustle up the words for the next chapter.